With only three contestants remaining, we’re closing in on the most dramatic finale ever of The Bachelor, at least that’s what the commercials are telling us!
This week, each of the ladies spent some one-on-one time with Sean in Thailand, going on some romantic dates, blah, blah, blah.
Who really cares about that? Let’s be honest, this week’s episode is all about the fantasy suites!
The fantasy suite is offered to each lady once it gets down to the finals. It’s an opportunity to spend the night alone with the bachelor in a swanky hotel room. The men always swear it’s an opportunity to get to know the ladies better without cameras following their every move, but it’s basically code for hooking up.
This season, however, Booker claims things are a little bit different.
“This used to be the best episode ever on The Bachelor, but they had this one dude a couple seasons ago. His name was Brad and he banged all the girls, so since then, nobody’s really kind of putting out on the show anymore because they don’t want to seem like they’re slutty on TV!”
And it’s not just the ladies worrying about their reputation.
“We’ve got the bachelor, Sean. He’s actually a sweet, respectful guy. He’s a really sweetheart of a guy, but he is playing the born again virgin card, so there’s no hanky panky,” Booker said.
So since sexy time just wasn’t in the cards this time around, ABC had an hour and 30 minutes to fill with lots and lots of talking.
To help make it a bit easier for those who aren’t die hard fans, Booker summarized who is still in the running for Sean’s affection.
“Let me recap the three girls, what we’re down to. We’re down to AshLee. Now that’s the frontrunner girl that I picked in week two to win the whole thing…She’s the one that has been screaming, literally, from the mountaintops, ‘I love Sean!’…We’ll just call her the hottest girl.”
“Then there’s Lindsay. Now she’s the girl that showed up in the wedding dress a little bit drunk. Everyone was kind of shocked she didn’t get tossed off the first night of the show. She’s actually kind of turned a little boring through the season, but she’s cute and everything. I would say she’s the practical girl.”
“The last girl is Catherine. Now, she’s the quirky, fun girl. She’s young, spirited. We call her the cutest girl because she really is the cutest girl on the show. Last week I said there was no point in even watching this week because I guaranteed you that she would be voted off the show.”
This week, practical girl Lindsay upped her game, finally admitting to Sean that she loved him.
“We’ve got our second ‘I love you.’ So the question is, do we now have a dark horse in the race?” Booker asked.
The answer is yes! Lindsay nabbed the first rose during the high-stakes ceremony, leaving AshLee and Catherine to duke it out.
“I was jumping up and down on my couch last night! It’s like the Steelers kicked the last-second field goal! It was crazy! Frontrunner girl, the girl I picked from week two…GONE! Hot girl is gone and it was awesome!”
After the ceremony, Sean tried to explain his decision to AshLee, but she wasn’t having any of it! She wouldn’t talk to him, heck, she wouldn’t even look at him! Once AshLee got into the limo, that’s when the tears started flowing.
“She felt like a big, giant reject,” Booker explained.
Well there you have it! But before Booker wrapped things up, he had this bit of wisdom to share…
“Ladies, I leave you with this. The hottest girl doesn’t always get the guy!”
You shouldn’t feel too badly for AshLee. He’s already predicting she will be the next bachelorette and asked for a little help from all you loyal Bachelor fans.
“If there are any women at all that remotely enjoy me doing this, please, please submit me! I mean, this girl’s unstable, she’s un-trusting, we’ve both been adopted. I’m looking at the next Mrs. Chris Booker here!”
Will there be a love connection? Guess we’ll have to tune in next season to find out!
Next Monday, we’ll take a break from all the lovey-dovey action for the juiciest episode of all…The Women Tell All! Expect some yelling, crying, and perhaps a girl fight or two!