This Week In Sports: The Royal Sweep-ment

by Brian Bernstein

NBA:

  • If you are one of those people who isn’t a fan of the NBA, and you watched the games this weekend and are still not a fan, then there’s no hope for you. You might as well call yourself a non-basketball fan.
  • Bron Bron’s alive! He’s alive! The Cavs had a historic game three when they erased the largest halftime deficit in NBA playoffs history (26), then The King’s three-point shot with a minute left in game-4 proved to be the final nail in Indiana’s coffin. His shot gave the Cavs a 103-102 lead to complete the sweep. Bron Bron has now won 20 straight first round games, and he and the Cavs will enjoy some rest while they await their next opponent, the winner of the Bucks and Raptors series.
  • Memphis beat San Antonio in overtime after a thrilling bout of clutch shots. If you don’t think Kawhi Leonard deserve some MVP recognition, or you think Grizzlies point guard Mike Conley is overrated, you’re crazy. These guys are ballers. This heavyweight fight is shaping up to go the distance.
  • Golden State proved they’re still the team to beat in the West by taking a commanding 3-0 series lead against Rip-City (Portland) even without KD (sore right calf muscle) and Head Coach Steve Kerr (complications to past back surgery). Sorry Portland, but the game is four quarters long, not three. Good luck in the Bay Area.
  • FOUL!!!!! All the Thunder had to do was foul when the ball was in-bounded. Instead they gave up a three-point play and essentially the series. UGH! So stupid. The battle between the two MVP candidates, Russell Westbrook and James Harden, is kind of living up to the hype, but not like we all expected. Houston will look to close out the series at home in game 5.
  • The Clippers not only lost power forward Blake Griffin for the reminder of the playoffs, AGAIN, with a toe injury that may require surgery, but a chance to put the series in a choke hold. The Utah Jazz welcomed back center Rudy Gobert and won a pivotal game, thanks to “Iso Joe” Johnson, to even the series at 2.
    • Cleveland 4 – Indiana 0
    • Toronto 2 – Milwaukee 2
    • Boston 2 – Chicago 2
    • Washing 2 – Atlanta 1
    • Golden State 3 – Portland 0
    • Houston 3 – Oklahoma City 1
    • San Anontio 2 – Memphis 2
    • Los Angeles 2 – Utah 2

MLB:

 

  • The Los Angeles Dodgers have been less than championship-like. Well lets be real, they have no pitching. President of Baseball Operations Andrew Friedman didn’t have the guts to resign Zack Greinke two years ago and now they are stuck relying on Rich Hill, who can’t win a battle against a blister, Kenta Maeda and Hyun-Jin Ryu who can’t top a 90 mph fastball, and Brandon McCarthy, who always gets injured. As a result of poor pitching, besides Clayton Kershaw of course, the Dodgers have lost five of their last seven and have a record of 9-10. I hope Friedman lifts the innings restriction on youngster Julio Urias and brings him up from the minors ASAP. Cause they need him.
  • The Halos are in a complete tale spin. I think they need to borrow Mark McGrath’s girlfriends halo from her four-post bed because theirs aren’t working. They have lost 10 of 12 and may have an even worse pitching rotation than their cross-town rivals. Their best starting pitcher’s ERA is 3.71, enter sarcastic laugh, which is not gonna get the job done. They may need the wish of a little kid to win the pennant. Quick! Somebody call Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Danny Glover.

NHL:

  • I love playoff hockey. Fewer penalties, less fighting (ok, this aspect sucks), more hard hits, more trash talking, and goals are more exciting. After a thrilling first round, and even with two five game series and two sweeps, the Stanley Cup Playoffs never disappoint. The second round is ready to go, and is anchored by the match-up of the Capitals versus the defending champs, the Penguins. This battle features the two best players in hockey today, Washington’s Alex Ovechkin and Pittsburgh’s Sidney Crosby. Lace up your skates boys, it’s time to get physical!
    • Pittsburgh Penguins vs Washington Captials
    • Ottawa Senators vs New York Rangers
    • St. Louis Blues vs Nashville Predators
    • Anaheim Ducks vs Edmonton Oilers
  • The Los Angeles Kings have wasted little time finding a replacement for the only coach in franchise history to bring The Cup to LA. Rob Blake, the Kings new general manager, has hired within the system and promoted assistant coach John Stevens to steer the ship. Stevens has been with the Kings since 2010 and is the architect of the physical defense the Kings have been feared for. Lets hope he can solve the riddle that is the Kings offense.

Soccer:

  • One of the greatest players in the world, and no ladies, I’m not talking about the model, but Lionel Messi scored his 500th career FC Barcelona goal beating Cristiano Ronaldo and Real Madrid 3-2. Messi got roughed up and bloodied but that didn’t stop him from netting two goals to put his club atop the La Liga standings. His coach said that his player is so good, “Messi even makes a difference when he’s at home having dinner.” I don’t know about that coach, but if that’s true, can I get a dinner date set up with him?

 

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